I still have her pictures.
The ones at the beach. The ones at a restaurant with her mother. The ones in the bathroom mirror. The ones after she cut her hair. The ones fresh out of the shower.
I have them all.
I haven't looked at them in months.
But they are there. Right there in that folder.
I could delete them. But why? My mind still remembers the excitement of those pictures, the smiles.
Besides, my heart wouldn't let me. Trust me, I tried. Numerous times.
I was a summer fling. Of course, in the back of mind, I knew this. But it didn't matter. She was the woman I used to dream about. I had this... idea that we were going to make it. We would go our separate ways and then years later, we would reconnect and then make our dreams come true.
I need to apologize, because our dreams really were MY dreams. And I tried my hardest to sleep while I was awake, so I could live out my dreams.
I slept so much, though, that I slept though all the signals. She left.
She left me with a folder full of past
I happily took it. I thought I was gonna dream forever.
Dream about her.
Dream about us.
Dream about what was.
Dream about what could be.
Sunlight's here, though. No more dreams.
I'm making my own reality.
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Now playing: Method Man, Ghostface, & Raekwon - Our Dreams
via FoxyTunes
4 comments:
Sometimes we can't see past what we want and that just may not be reality. But, you live and you learn. I feel u on not deleting your pics, because regardless of the results she was still part of ur past. Great Post!
I must cosign 25. Literally wrote what I was thinking.
P.S. I missed your writing!
Wow. My feelings and thoughts tht I couldnt bare to write on my own blog. This has touched me on too many levels. Its beautifully written...and exactly what i needed to read! Thanks for this!
*tear*
I delete pictures. I burn them. I rip them to pieces with bitter hands. I put them in my paper shredder.
As long as you can hold these memories without it paining your heart, I'm all for you keeping them.
I.Just.Cannot.Do.It.
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