Just Venting...

My mind is racing, I'm a little upset now.
I let you get me out my zone and I don't know how.
You actually have the audacity and gall-
Wait, let me start over before I stall.
See, I got enough problems I have to deal with
And I don't need an addition, especially not your bull$#!%
I look up, look back, but never straight ahead.
Call it a defect, irrationality, or a case of bed head.
Ugh, I got a bad head, bad thoughts, bad dreams.
You can call them nightmares, displayed on movie screens.
No need for teen screams, or adult for that matter.
Super run of bad luck, which mirror did I shatter?
The one I was looking into, trying to change that man.
But that man said he's staying, forget leaving, he has a plan.
But he never lets me in, so my thoughts are all hazy.
Now I got my friends swearing up and down that I'm crazy.
Because my 28 years of me being on this planet
Let me know nothing turns out exactly how you plan it.
So, my mistakes and things I did wrong I take and own.
And my gun just told me it'll never leave my heart alone.
So now I gotta start leaving my heart at home,
I have no permit for that concealed chrome.
The gun said that I left my heart unguarded,
And I'm trying to figure out when that started.
Because I never had ownership of my heart
It was some time ago me and it decided to part.
But how am I living? Am I still alive?
Or is this all a dream, of which the only thing I strive,
Is to wake up, because this dream is over.
Look at myself in the mirror and say 'I told ya.'
But now the question is am I looking into the mirror?
Or is the mirror looking into me a little bit clearer?

*said to myself while looking into... yeah*